Friday, 31 July 2015


Hey, remember that test font I made? Remember it was nearly useless due to the fact it had no lower case, well know looks what's happened!

I've bloody well gone and spent my whole morning making a lower case, fixing kerning and adding more glyphs; because although it's angles are crap and there isn't an inch of precision in this font—I kind of like it. 

Have it free, cheaper than chips! Even Greece could afford this font!

This font is free for personal and commercial use. It is not to be re-distributed or altered from it's present state. As it is a first first, and a test font please let me know if you find any fault with it.

Tuesday, 28 July 2015

01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100011 01101111 01101101 01110000 01110101 01110100 01100101 01110010 01110011

Now, depending on how sad you are – and how much free time you have – you might have figured out what the title translates to. And no, I won't tell you, cheater.

"WE NEED A POSTER DOING AT BREAK NECK SPEED" read the email, and that's exactly what it was; done in one Saturday morning with heaps of tea and the strange desire to include fictional robots from films of past decades and CRT monitors. Don't ask why.
The lovely lads at The Brickyard need a poster done for The Computers and they needed it as faster than the decline in sales of Wobble Boards after the sentencing of Rolf Harris.

I stated with the idea of some strange robot woman comedy sketch I once saw, I presume possibly the Two Ronnies, but I can't be fully sure. I remember a scene where one woman tried to look in a mirror but the monitor kept cutting out and although I don't fully remember it, it really does make me chuckle.

I just went a little crazy with this to be honest; madly adding text, drawing exclamation marks and well just making it as fast as my shaky little 7:30am fingers could. Shaking with a mixture of excitement, tea leaves and an abundance of The Computers back-catalogue.

Also, I managed to squeeze my font on there.
Cheeky cheeky.

Sunday, 26 July 2015


I've seen this a few times and where it has many correct points, it also has a few that make little sense to me.
This could all be bullshit, but it's on my blog, so what'cha gonna do?

She is saying she doesn't need feminism because she wants equality, and that feminism isn't a movement for equality for both sexes, and to a point that is correct. She is correct in saying she doesn't need feminism, because clearly like everyone else in this world she needs and wants for true equality.

The problems start when she highlight the facts that feminists are not 'standing' for, and thus almost ignoring. Feminism is not just a term that dictates a movement to allow women more power than men – under the branches of feminism comes the issues of qouta filling, over-leniency in court and other privileges that women have over men; because they are just as un-equal as unfair pay and sexism.

Feminism is titled so because it was originally about letting women pass the boundaries as placed for them by men, which helped spawn the title. Just because it has 'femin' in the title does not make it exclusivity for female rights; it is merely named so because the original driving force of the movement was to achieve equality by raising the privileges women were allowed to the level men had (or have).

I am male, and would classify myself a feminist – and I feel her disregard of 'not needing feminism' is almost insane, due to the fact if it was never needed, and people had never stood to fight for women's rights under the banner of 'feminism' her rather valid points and her argument raised in this video would never of seen the light of day; due to the inequality placed on women in the past.

I knew none of these statistics, though they didn't shock me, because of the social pressure, expectancy and codes that are enforced on you the day your chromosome mutates. Gender is a social construct that effects men the same why in which it has and effects women – whether that allows you privilege in and area or severe disadvantage in another.

The points she raised are about the inequality put on 'male' humans, stand to be just as important as feminism is about inequality on 'female' humans. The fact is, however you want to disagree with the title, or the people who embellish it; all humans need equality and feminism is a movement working towards achieve it for both genders by focusing on what were and what are the disadvantages of being female.

In my eyes, not needing feminism is not needing equality.

Also, the opening of the description is "Watch this hot blonde girl" ugh.

Thursday, 23 July 2015

Vincent Walden's Not So Professional Reviews: The Tale of Princess Kaguya

It's that time again, where I make a stab at something passionately and write like a 12 year old!

The Tale of Princess Kaguya – Studio Ghibli's first feature release since the retirement of animation legend, Hayao Miyazaki. He did in-fact retire, then un-retire, then become a member of the board and now I assume he's breeding cats in space or something like that.

Anyway, Studio Ghibli is always a firm favourite of mine, and I am yet to find a company that has produced so many great films that have both made me look on in awe and wonder, whilst wondering why there are small woodland creatures flying using their testicles. I think their films are fantastic and aside from a few films (My Neighbours the Yamadas, Ocean Waves) I would say that their portfolio, or rather collection is almost god-like in quality.

So, with that in mind I was excited to watch their latest release—as directed by Isao Takahata. I was excited to see what he would do; as he has directed feature Ghibli films before, but he almost seemed more of Miyazaki's understudy, and now that he has full freedom due to Miyazaki's retirement I knew this would be the film for him to truly spread his wings.

I haven't read anything about the story or the film, and this review is going on only what I saw and experienced, so I hope it doesn't read like a cubist painting.

The film was fucking fantastic! The art style was very much making it obvious that they keep the tradition of hand drawn animation alive, and it was in such a way that allowed the film to flow rather than you constantly thinking "Wow, that's hand drawn" of which I was very impressed by. You do notice it's beauty at first, but once the story starts you are just inevitably drawn in and follow the images on screen as a tale acted before you rather than drawings on paper.

I found the animation even more pleasing when I realised this style hadn't really even existed in the Studio Ghibli archive; although it was an old technique it really brought a fresh feeling to the film – I know that 'the film that we shall not speak of yamadas' was in a hand drawn style, but that and this were world apart in quality and suitability. The animation also allowed the art style to change for certain sections throughout the film; jumping to a sketchy, rough look when the princess was running furiously through a dense area of undergrowth—which by the way, is possibly some of the best animation I have ever seen in my life.

Now not wanting to just waffle on about the animation; I will also say, the story, oh my. The story is just as bloody insane as some of their other Takahata films, but it works in a way that makes me look at the screen thinking; that baby just came from a bamboo, I haven't a clue what the context of that is, but I bloody love it.
I believe the story is based on an old folk tale, though I could be wrong. But if it is, then I applaude you fine ladies and gentlemen even more. Usually folklore tales are very straight to the point, allow for little expansion in story and always hold a message – but this film has moon people and a resonating feeling of a strange family tension that Studio Ghibli seem to grasp really well.

I realise at this point, I've written a lot here and well, I feel none of it works towards explaining how much I really did enjoy this film. So it's a strong 9.5/10 for me Bruce, and the only reason that I didn't give it full marks was the fact I wish I knew more of the original tale to understand it better.

Tour Posters mit godzilla und schöne Fotografie

Them lads from Colt 45 are doing a tour—and it's in the land of Oktoberfest, the land of the Bratwurst. 

And if you have read the title, read the heading, and seen the word 'Bratwurst' I think you should know what I'm trying to tell you. Colt 45 are on their trips to Germany to make the casks of wheat beer tremble with Cumbrian angst.

So when are they going? Where are they visiting and what on earth has Godzilla got to do with this?
That's where my favourite past time comes in – A GIG POSTER OF COURSE!
It tells you everything you need to know, and not only that; it's filled with lovely photography and an overgrown scaled monster from the depths of Japanese creativity.

I was told they wanted two things. One poster that would make someone think "My god, I need to be at this gig" and another poster that showed a more serious side, of course without coming across as boring, because that's what the guys are clearly far from.

The idea with these posters were to start with the more 'formal' one first, and then make the more exciting one follow the formula of the previous. I wanted the posters to be almost polar opposites yet still link together with their structure.
The idea is still yet to be proven; but my idea is that if someone see's both of these posters they'll hopefully realise they are for the same band though will show both sides that these lads hold. I know I'm rather hopeless at explaining things so I'll break it down.

The more formal poster shows the lads can be professional but still blast out those punk riffs and harsh drum solos. And the Godzilla poster just says; well it says "THERE'S GODZILLA FIGHTING A THREE HEADED BEAST HERE" and I couldn't think of a greater contrast, nor something more exciting.

Wednesday, 22 July 2015

Do you want a free font? OF COURSE YOU DO!

I made myself a font as a way to learn how to use the software I have for font creation – it turned out a little lacklustre so you can have it for free, if you like!

For all I know, it could be unusable, terrible and hated—but it was a first font, a test and not much else. 

I'm not sure how to describe it, but if you like what you see above, then feel free to download it.
You can use this all you want, free of charge, and if you'd like to use this commercially then please contact me; though if you are a registered charity, feel free to use it as you please.

There is no case variation and very few glyphs; but I think it makes an okay heading font. God forbid you use this as a body font though – the x-height is non-existent, it's so slender and rough. So don't do that, but otherwise knock yourself out! 

Monday, 20 July 2015

Churchill + Cigar + Colours = Gig Poster?

 What is pink & yellow, but also green & black, and ran a successful country through a war? No, it's not Churchill on acid—but that's not far off!

Let's make this easy, I mean the heading is confusing and unrelated enough, so I'm not going to give you any introductions, but you will get vague descriptions and names and you'll be flippin' well appy' with em' you ere!

Lewis is a friend, and he said "Hello friend, perhaps I could trouble one to produce an image to promote thou's up-coming music performance; now would that be of interest to you old chap?"
Which that roughly translates to, "Can we have a poster?" and any time that question is asked there is only one response that can utter from my lips, like sour milk from a lactose intolerant OAP.

I straightened my back, filled my lungs with air and exclaimed "What are you doing in my washing machine, naked, covered in honey? And also yeah, why not."

Actually, casual lying is become a problem for me; especially in blog posts. So I did the poster and I'm rather chuffed with it. I found an image of Winston Churchill, drew him from reference to avoid copyright and then made him some the coolest of typography cigars that ever existed. Even Cuba don't make cigars this cool.

Originally, it was this colour set of Yellow and Pink. Though when shown to the other touring band, they felt it didn't fit well with their image – so I cracked out the old classic of 'atomic green' and 'soulless black'.

Have a nice rest of your day!

Saturday, 4 July 2015

Loose Collabs m8

m8 i gt bord of riting srlsly so av fun readin this lad

so like i did a poster wit me m8 James, and since then we av like done little bits together 4 the loose posters but like this 1 we totally like wrked together and made a full poster and stuff.
he like made the collage (no idea what that means) and sent it 2 me and then i changed it to make it work, for this local mosher night.

they play shit like the beatles n stuff, so its full ov ppl wiv long hair and singing about yellow boats or summit. i no one person on this poster and its that guy called nivarna on the left, but i do like the colours and hand writing coz it luks like mine.

Wednesday, 1 July 2015

From the Motor City, to northern Cumbria.

Posters for the club night that's funkier than 'The Funky Drummer' soiling himself to the sound of the JB's covering Parliament.

So, it's me again, banging on about a Motown and Soul posters, but this time I've got all Americana about it. I had a look around at the traditional soul posters and ended up finding myself in a range of Detroit 'motor city' advertisement posters; laden in simple red and blue, and then I was smitten.

I instantly gave up the hunt for a traditional soul poster and went straight to hunting down old ass industrial revolution americana printings – and it was like a world of blue and red excitement. It's was like watching your first 3D movie with those crappy red and blue glasses, except I was looked at google and not a chunky black VHS.

Anyway, I raided my font library, slapped out a nice red and blue and dug out my favourite image of Otis Redding; also not forgetting about you Gladys!

Copyright © Vincent Walden Sucks